Living with regret is hard and sometimes overwhelming. Often I find myself wishing I could go back in time and undo all the things I have done wrong. I wish I could take back the hurtful things I have said to others. I wish I could take back the times I have hurt my family and friends. I would give anything to travel back in time and make better choices, but I can’t. I use to think that if I dedicated my life to serving others it would make all my mistakes go away. I use to think that if I helped enough people, just maybe I would feel better about myself and move toward peace and finally let go of my mistakes. I now know that nothing I do today can undo my mistakes of the past. I have to accept that I have hurt people along the way and there is nothing I can do to change that.
What I can do is work extremely hard at making sure I don’t make the same mistakes in the future. Control my temper, be patient with others, demonstrate grace whenever it’s needed, love unconditionally, learn to forgive those who have done me wrong and most importantly, learn to forgive myself. As for serving others, I love to serve others but I need to make sure that my motivation is the right one. I need to remind myself that I am serving because I am called to serve by using my not perfect self, to glorify God. Live today like there is no tomorrow. Set aside your regrets, hurts and fears and live today knowing that God loves you no matter how broken you are, no matter what you have done.